I didn't forget you. I've been savouring you in my heart all through December. Where did you go? You ran off before I could catch my breath. You were an energetic month. Upbeat and forthright. A month of many changes.
On the 4th, a new chapter began. I still can't believe how lucky I am to have joined corporate Australia. I've heard of horror stories. Smart brains with three degrees being forced into cleaning and security jobs. Wira ni Wira after all. (Work is Work after all). But after long hours and thousands of dollars spent on student loans, you'd expected life to be fairer. You'd expect that life's burdens would lift. But life abroad has a way of pushing you into survival mode. Bills to pay have no sympathy. You do all you can to get by. Just to get by. Just to survive. Life abroad is no slumber on roses. Chimamanda Adichie in Americanah was right.
I thank you. I thank you for shining your light upon me and so favouring me. That I found sustenance. I prayed for that day, for the November 4th and as sure as the sunset, it came and went.
And so days flew by. Days on the train spent listening to those French Australian kids. They break into romantic fluency just as a child would from Swahili to Kikamba. They don't miss a beat. Always giggly. Teasing each other. Children. Childhood. Refreshing.
But #adulting is here. And its relentless. I have been lucky to be housed by "Mrs. Turner". I've yet to meet a more selfless, direct and loving woman. She gives without complaining, her labours, full of love. If only I can be half the woman she is! But time acts in such a way as to constantly push you out of your comfort zone, and soon I'll be leaving to nest on my own.
You strained my heart and my mind. Tagged one way by the blog. Yes, you on whose bossom I blossom. You in whose heart I confide. To blog is to pour your heart out, to share your being selflessly so that others may be whole. Running a two week long series was exhilarating, a process in pouring out myself. Many nights I'd wake at 3am. To have everything ready for the day ahead. What can I say? I love to blog. I love to share my life with you, even when the cost is sometimes more tangible than I'd publicly admit. The journey has been worth it, thanks for reading.
You strained my heart and my mind. Tagged in one way by him. Loving another as yourself is not easy. Listening and forgiving are a lot harder. Selfishness is a trait so engrained in our psyche. But I wouldn't ask God for another. When I dreamt of love, it was him that I thought of and now that he's here, he's the perfect one. I've fallen deeply. In love. Him.
I found Yellow.
I foundd laughter with Chl*, Ker*, Cin*, Lau*, Tan*, and Sco*. I couldn't have asked for better team members!
I found light from within to adjust, to step forth in confidence and begin a new chapter of my life.
I found energy from you and for you, my readers to keep writing, to keep creating, to keep sharing.
I found yellow. Thank you.
Love & Sunshine,